A Thought Experiment for ROGD Parents

Carey Callahan
7 min readJun 8, 2022

Your minor child wants a septum piercing.

You have concerns about both the physical and social risks of a septum piercing. You have concerns about whether your child’s thinking is mature enough to consider the risks and make plans ahead of time to manage the risks. You feel unable to communicate those concerns to your child without your child reacting to the implicit judgment that they are not fully competent to make these decisions.

Your child believes you have old fashioned ideas about septum piercing. They believe you don’t understand the current state of the world and that there are accessible support networks, including housing and employment avenues, for people with septum piercings. They believe your opposition to septum piercings is coming from rash, bigoted judgments about people with septum piercings.

Now here’s my question: in this septum piercing situation I’ve described, do you want the Republican party to ban septum piercings for minors in your state?

At this point you may be pissed at me, and I expect a lot of trans allies are pissed at me too. Our pissed off-ness at the “opposing” tribe in this round of Culture War Vote Grab is the biggest obstacle to thinking through our political actions, and how our kids are going to respond to our political actions.

Trans allies, I’m aware the desire for medical transition is a much heavier set of emotions to bear than wanting a septum piercing. I’m not speaking to you in this post. You are not the target audience. Of course you are free to be a witness to the conversations between detransitioners and ROGD parents.

Back to it: do you want the Republicans to ban septum piercings for minors in your state? Would the Republicans doing this be helpful to your child’s wellbeing or harmful?

This is a distinct question from whether the septum piercing is helpful or harmful. This difference- that being opposed to your kid getting a septum piercing is a distinctly different viewpoint than being for the republicans banning septum piercings for minors in your state- is vital for you to hold onto.

If septum piercings are banned for minors in your state because of campaigning from the Republican party, what impact will that have on your child’s decision making and desire for a septum piercing?

I don’t know your kid. There are many different kinds of kids out there, including Republican…



Carey Callahan

LPCC, IMFT, detransitioner, I don't do twitter bc ppl are awful, follow me on tiktok @detranslightful